am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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