Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
