Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
