Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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