Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Sext me about skeletons
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Randomize