My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
