She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
