The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Randomize
