you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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