Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
