gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
time to smoke my breakfast
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
last night I used snow as a chaser
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
