So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
