Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
