why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
