thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
