I just made out with a guy for $7.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
You took a bar mat shot.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
