Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
