...so i touched it.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
