I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
