One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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