He had one of those small greek statue penises
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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