Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
