Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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