Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
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