she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
