I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
