break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
