No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
