I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
A+ Viking dick
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
