i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
