Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
