I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
