K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize