Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
