I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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