Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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