I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
