I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
