bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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