But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
