Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I forgot wine drunk hurts
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
