The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Randomize
