we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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