11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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