I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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