I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
