I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
