Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
