I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
