hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
